My buddy wrote this and i was wondering what you guys think. He said he was up late just writing shit, I dont know what to tell him. But he wants reviews so check it out. Can anyone relate?


The worst time to be up
Is all night long
Composin’ a poem
That suddenly turns into a song
Sittin down just wondering
What the fuck I did so wrong

God giveth and god taketh away
Got a new baby neice
But said goodbye to papi
And a badass uncle
Who was a dude that was true
Straight down to the knuckle

Anger inside that burns like a wildfire
Set off by a single bare spark
Consumes my whole body and mind
Runs in the family
Dad uncle and papi has have had it too
Crazy ass shit is the only thing said
about it that’s absolutely completely true

Some could call it a gift
A mans fighting fire
But ive seen it rip apart my desires
Like a relationship with my father
And a family fearless of me
Lost control means differed demeanor
And dented doors
The little control I have
I fight for, for when its lost
I’m not driving

It's good...

On a scale of 1-10 I would give it a 7.5, it has good rhythm and rhyme, but near the end the rhyme scheme seems to disappear, but overall it is quite a good poem.

I actually wrote it but didnt want to take credit for it if it got flamed. Its kind of some personal shit. But yea i would change the ending around to flow better. But its based off of a lot of pain. I dont write poems or consider poems writing, i see real poems as strong thoughts or emotions that translates into what it is

i think its pretty emotional, its good. deep. haha,but you cant be scared like that even though its a personal poem..have balls and step up to your work

its good though

lol i knew it was him who wrote it havent read it but whatever.. who would post something there friend wrote but eh w/e good you addmited it but just grow some stones and its all good