I need spiritual help

[ledzeppeman]

Hey all you religious people, I'm not one of ya, but I was wondering if anyone knew of a legible way to "sell" my soul for some possesions. The way I see it, I'm going to hell anyway so it's completely worth it. I kinda want unlimited great weed and I'm about to be kinda fucked in the head so yea... help would be good.

[Zamato Elite]

Hey all you religious people, I'm not one of ya, but I was wondering if anyone knew of a legible way to "sell" my soul for some possesions. The way I see it, I'm going to hell anyway so it's completely worth it. I kinda want unlimited great weed and I'm about to be kinda fucked in the head so yea... help would be good.

Try ebay. :D

[Ghostfacekiller]

I think your taking "sell your soul to the devil" in the literal fashion, where as it means to spend your entire life and being trying to do somthing that is a sin basicly giving your soul to the devil by comiting these act just to obtain somthing.

[ItsAPoorlyKeptSecret]

i think i need spirtatual help to, but not sellin my soul sort of finding it kinda way, should i try e-bay too??
maybe i can buy his soul for a bag of weed if he goes there?

[Ghostfacekiller]

If one can sell there soul can one also rent there soul.

[ItsAPoorlyKeptSecret]

thats probably be where i should start with, renting. i'm not much for long term nonsense

[Ghostfacekiller]

Im guess ing $50 a week for the average person, maybe as high as $200 for a Ned Flanders type.

[ItsAPoorlyKeptSecret]

How much for a Amy Winehouse type??

[Ghostfacekiller]

3 dollars in food stamps

[freetibet]

Well that would be damaged goods so maybe like... 6.66?

@original post
I'm guessing you already sold your soul to the devil without realizing it so you're out of luck... sorry

You still have your body though, you could sell that!

[Ghostfacekiller]

who says you get what you want in this life?

[ItsAPoorlyKeptSecret]

hahaha thats my kind of price.

So on another note, cant say i've heard the answer to this but what the hell are souls for anyway?? this sounds like a job for wiki

[Ghostfacekiller]

The can cook, soul food Ba Dum Chhh

There collectables like beenie babies

[LiveWire]

... i think some one ate my soul.

[freetibet]

did you ask them how it tasted?

[LiveWire]

no... though i imagin it being my soul it wouldn't taste very nice.

[Buddha]

It tasted a little fishy.

[LiveWire]

... it wasn't you who ate it.

[ItsAPoorlyKeptSecret]

pheonix was all for eating souls i believe, but its was ME!!! who took your soul!!!

[LiveWire]

yes it was itsa... I FUCKN WANT IT BACK BITCH!!

[ItsAPoorlyKeptSecret]

No, I need it more then you!!

[LiveWire]

what the hell would you need my soul for?
I baked you cookies

[ItsAPoorlyKeptSecret]

you baked boysenberry tho i dont want them!

and i need it cause i dont have one and i need to collect them to be powerful! Mwahaha

[ramalamafafafa]

Lets all fuck.

[LiveWire]

I gave you oaty ones in the end!

where the hell did yours do anyway?

[ItsAPoorlyKeptSecret]

i dont even know, its kind of like with my cell phone i'll have it in my hand, then i randomly put it down somewhere without realizing it then walk away, then like 2 minutes realize i cant find the phone, so i have to search for it, or have someone else call it, and well i dont think i can call a soul on a phone... but will everyone keep a look out for it?

[LiveWire]

Sure... if i find yours can i have mine back?!

[ItsAPoorlyKeptSecret]

well..... i dont kno its so cozy

[LiveWire]

my soul? cozy?!
I bet its putting up a fight.

My soul is dark and angry and paranoid and has a massive crack in it....

unless you've fixed it.

[ItsAPoorlyKeptSecret]

thats why we get alone so well... it tells the best ghost stories too i dont think i can part with it

[Phoenix Fire]

AhahahhaaHAHAHHAHAAHHAHAHAHA
aww

DAMNIT ITSA

You made me pee myself...

[LiveWire]

.... I miss the ghost stories.

[ItsAPoorlyKeptSecret]

yea we become best friends cant be separated or bad things will happen says so in the prophecy

be happy to pass along any ghost stories it tells me in the future tho kay, it says it will write and keep in touch but that it might be best if it was a clean break

[LiveWire]

NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
*mourns soul and plans destructive killing rampage*

[ItsAPoorlyKeptSecret]

*laughs and frolic with livewires soul*

happy happy joy joy

[LiveWire]

*goes and cries i corner sharpening spork*

[Zenof]

If the devil were real he would be the best lawyer ever. If you sell your soul make sure you wright it out first, if what you wright it out is soo long that it would seem too long then you have done a good job. Make sure you fine tune it to your liking too! Use scientific words...
If you say I want unlimited weed without the prosecution of any form of government then you will get a yard full of weeds and not marijuana.

[ItsAPoorlyKeptSecret]

*goes and cries i corner sharpening spork*

My spork would kill your spork!!

[LiveWire]

never... im a much better spork fighter.
but lol at the pic

[ramalamafafafa]

Ahhhh, it's good to see the batman spork once more, Itsy.

[LiveWire]

hopefully its not really batman. otherwise my spork won't stand a chance...

[ItsAPoorlyKeptSecret]

Ahhhh, it's good to see the batman spork once more, Itsy.

I kno!! glad to kno there was a use for it after all, after the whole confusion thing, i missed my spork!

never... im a much better spork fighter.
but lol at the pic

hopefully its not really batman. otherwise my spork won't stand a chance...

Aw but thats where your wrong. I have been underground cage spork fighting to the death for as far back as i can remember. We will see who comes out of this alive!

Come livewire's soul, and Batman spork! To the batmobile!!

[crazyassmetalhead]

i'm not gonna bother reading the other 5 pages of this cause the computer i'm on is shit and barely has any ram so it'd take to long...i did read the 1st page though and you can rent your soul. it's called joining the military.

at least when you sell your soul to satan you get shit....god is a real dousch

but i'm pretty much a nihilist so fuck all that shit

[Deetinator]

It's never too late to turn back. The criminal on Jesus side made it to heaven!

[ramalamafafafa]

It's never too late to turn back. The criminal on Jesus side made it to heaven!

Fuck. You.

I'm unbelivbly sick of this shit. Bible quotes and the like are not valid arguements, dumb cunt.

[Deetinator]

Geez, I'm sorry for having an opinion and trying to inspire hope in someone.

[ramalamafafafa]

Geez, I'm sorry for having an opinion and trying to inspire hope in someone.

Hope? Religion gives nothing but war, greed and death.

[Deetinator]

I got something more than a religion. I've got a Savior. He came to love. He was ho***ess. He hung out with the lowest of the low. And his death brought life to millions.

Take it or leave it, he gives us that choice.

[ItsAPoorlyKeptSecret]

i never really understood the whole "he gave his life for our sins" care to shed some light on that and how "his death brought life to millions" cause i must not of paid attention in class that day there was a baby boom just before what we now know as Easter.

[Deetinator]

Certainly. This will be a little long, but whatever.

It starts out with God creating us. We were in a 'perfect' state, and could be in the constant presence of God. But Adam and Eve chose to leave it because we wanted to try to be like God. Of course, it couldn't happen, and we were banished from Paradise (the Garden of Eden). We fell from our state because we disobeyed God, had too much pride. The world in a disordered state, people now had to worry about being on God's good side, being "clean", and would make sacrifices to God to pay for their sins. Then, at the opportune time, when Jerusalem was the "cross-roads" of the world (the Roman Empire), Jesus came, the foretold Messiah. It happened at this time so that the the Gospel could spread to all the world. Jesus was fully God and fully man, and it had to happen this way. Because of his role as the perfect sacrifice, the only perfect man, and his infinite divinity as God, all men were saved. What proved he was also perfect was his resurrection. Death is the price for sin. He never sinned, so his death covered our punishment. We still sin and have sinned, which is why we die, but we are at least saved from eternal death. We are saved from eternal separation from God. So the life brought forth from Him is life after death, with God, instead of separation and utter loneliness, which is worse than death.

That's really the basis of Christianity. There's more stuff, but all you need to know is:

1) We're all sinners
2) Jesus paid for it
3) ????
4) Profit!

Just kidding with number 3.

[The Anarchist]

Take a look at some of these vids (http://worldslastchance.com/index.php?option=com_hwdvideoshare&Itemid=224&limit=12&limitstart=0). They will help you out.

[pyrex]

person who made this thread----Your a rascist twat and a disgrace to the your profile picture.

try ebay or amazon.

[Pactum]

well your best bet is either e-bay or amazon.... i saw a massive amount of souls for sale there. Price ranges are unpredictable as it depends how worthy the soul is.

You could always try the dark alleys in Nepal, i heard there was a black market for souls there.

Good luck! Hope you find a buyer!!

[Zamato Elite]

Take a look at some of these vids (http://worldslastchance.com/index.php?option=com_hwdvideoshare&Itemid=224&limit=12&limitstart=0). They will help you out.

Thanks for the link! I have been looking for a Zeitgeist rebuttal for a long time now. I knew that documentary was full of shit.

[Deetinator]

Yeah, it doesn't take a genius to figure son/sun don't rhyme in every other language as well, but its nice to have a video to reference

[ItsAPoorlyKeptSecret]

Certainly. This will be a little long, but whatever.

It starts out with God creating us. We were in a 'perfect' state, and could be in the constant presence of God. But Adam and Eve chose to leave it because we wanted to try to be like God. Of course, it couldn't happen, and we were banished from Paradise (the Garden of Eden). We fell from our state because we disobeyed God, had too much pride. The world in a disordered state, people now had to worry about being on God's good side, being "clean", and would make sacrifices to God to pay for their sins. Then, at the opportune time, when Jerusalem was the "cross-roads" of the world (the Roman Empire), Jesus came, the foretold Messiah. It happened at this time so that the the Gospel could spread to all the world. Jesus was fully God and fully man, and it had to happen this way. Because of his role as the perfect sacrifice, the only perfect man, and his infinite divinity as God, all men were saved. What proved he was also perfect was his resurrection. Death is the price for sin. He never sinned, so his death covered our punishment. We still sin and have sinned, which is why we die, but we are at least saved from eternal death. We are saved from eternal separation from God. So the life brought forth from Him is life after death, with God, instead of separation and utter loneliness, which is worse than death.

That's really the basis of Christianity. There's more stuff, but all you need to know is:

1) We're all sinners
2) Jesus paid for it
3) ????
4) Profit!

Just kidding with number 3.


AHAHA! wow i think you just converted me, as long as i can listen to taht kind of stuff and be under some sort of influence and completely disagree but still want to hear more does that count?? where can i get more of that shit? was very entertaining to read!! and i dont mean that bible shit but that interpretation of what the bible offers!

[Deetinator]

Ha, well happy to give a summary. Although I think I'm in a small minority of Christians that watch South Park.

[Tarasen]

Ahahahahah, South Park is awesome, I never knew God was Buddhist.

[Warpurlgis]

lol underpants gnomes...

[Cerron Pyra]

it dont work like that dude if u need help selling your soul (and this goes for all of u) let me know im an experienced Satanist

[crazyassmetalhead]

haha a satanist........ i hope your kidding

seriously

[ramalamafafafa]

HA!!!

Fuck, these people crack me up....

[crazyassmetalhead]

i hope he wishes to tell us his beliefs.......shit that's what this forum needs to be.

just arguing

gonna make a new thread

[evil pirate]

go to the church of satan! they know how to sell ure soul

[ramalamafafafa]

go to the church of satan! they know how to sell ure soul

I'll sell my soul for you to learn to fucking spell.

Really, why not just type "Your".

[ItsAPoorlyKeptSecret]

Google will one day become a religion I predict that shit right now!

[Cuddles]

Google will one day become a religion I predict that shit right now!

you're late.

http://www.thechurchofgoogle.org/

been around for...several years, afaik....