I need help

[lilpimpin]

I have a roommate that's a real fucking asshole. My brother is handicap and he doesn't take care of him. His only job is to take care of him. All he does is drink all day. He was ho***ess before he moved in and he'll be ho***ess when he leaves. I bought him clothes to go to work. He worked one day and told me to shove it up my ass. He tells my mom every little thing I do. I'm 27yrs old, mind you. He's about 50yrs old. He knows that I'll never tell on him, to my mom and he takes advantage of that. Yet, he tells on me for any little thing I do. He only feeds my handicap brother like once a day. He sells his food stamps that is supposed to pay his rent, for half price so he can buy beer instead. My dad died five years ago and my roommate is trying to run me out of the house when it was left to me, but my mother (being next of kin) still has say-so. I don't believe in snitching, telling, or calling the cops on people. But he obviously does. I want to get even with him. I don't want to kill him. I just want him to know that I had my revenge and that I'm not to be taken advantage of. Even being taken advantage of could be let go, but he's fucking my family, but it's against my beliefs to tell on him. I need to get even.. seriously even. Keep in mind that any ideas that are sent really need to be one person based. Like I said before my brother lives in the house as well and he's handicap. I only want to hurt my roommate who has nothing to show for himself, no car, job, anything.. Just him, his bicycle and squatting rights in my late father's house. I just want to hurt him directly and leave everything and everybody else intact. Please help. ASAP. You can email me at ryanbateson@hotmail.com TY.

I could have went into a lot more detail with this, but it's late and my girlfriend REALLY doesn't feel like typing anymore. Thank you so much for any input. She's happy to still make me laugh through this.

[Buddha]

Whatever you do, do it right. Get it right the first time, dont fuck around.

[Phoenix Fire]

He's a Hobo?
Beat him to death with a baseball bat, that's what we do here in Florida.

[Master Pyrofire]

give him... the casino royale james bond treatment! >=)

[Cannon D]

He's a Hobo?
Beat him to death with a baseball bat, that's what we do here in Florida.

that sounds good, or since he drinks tons of beer if he were to fall asleep or passout write random crap on his facewhen he is passed out, take his clothes off, and duck tape him to a statue.

[deathlord888]

that sounds good, or since he drinks tons of beer if he were to fall asleep or passout write random crap on his facewhen he is passed out, take his clothes off, and duck tape him to a statue.

piss in his beer
then put chlorine in the other

[hydromonster]

y cant you just kick him out?
that would be the easiest
and you would get rid of him without killing him

[OhShitNigga]

Take his food stamps and hide them in his working boots.

[Phoenix Fire]

y cant you just kick him out?
that would be the easiest
and you would get rid of him without killing him

Not killing him?
the hell is wrong with you

[lilpimpin]

I'm happy to make everybody laugh and entertain, but I kinda need realistic (non-lethal) ideas for this clown.

[mistikman]

I'm adding you on MSN.
glenno_is_da_roxo@hotmail.com

[drugfeind]

you should tell him hes a fucking douchebag and to stop being such a sponge...but if talking sdoesnt work then start stealing all his beer

[hydromonster]

be a total ass hole and run him out before he runs you out
and if its your/your families place dont you have the right to just kick him out?

[MISFlT]

kick him out and put an ad in the paper thats looking for a roomate that can take care of someone.. that fuckin easy

[Warpurlgis]

you know obiviously the guy has problems you may be pissed but i would leave him alone and just make him move out

[Exploding_viper]

steal his beer and replace it one can at a time with cans of piss.
take his food stamps and wipe your ass with them
kick him out

what handycap does your bro suffer from and why is your girl typing

really not taht hard to think of

[skullcandy]

Get some camp soap, also known as camp suds. Every time he leaves a beer unattended, or unfinished, put one drop into it. Every time he drinks it he'll have diarrehiah. Or, take his bicycle and sell it. Use the money from it to buy something truly useless like a dictionary, then destroy the reciet. but mostly id suggest my first idea.

[Warpurlgis]

or just get water from mexico

[skullcandy]

camp soap is easier to obtain. plus not everyone is affected by moctezumas revenge.

[psyonic_7]

Nair Bomb.

Make some water ballons up that are filled with 75% "Nair Lasting Results Cream" and a 25% water and then just bombard the fucker. Three minutes later his hair is falling out from where ever you hit him. 5 minutes of your time = weeks of his hair growing back.

[CHEETZzz]

dude, kick him out
don't take that shit

and wow you really left alot of cliffhangers didn't you lol

[onthejon55]

get some buddies, stage a break in when your folks arent home, kidnap the worthless fucker, threaten him till he pisses his pants, use mace on him, then take his clothes off tie him to a chair blind folded and leave him in a public place

[ratman66699]

Sleeping powder + Laxatives in his beer

sounds kinda lame but it can be suprisingly effective

[sqizzie]

Go all devils rejects on his ass,wait until he falls asleep then ducktape his ass up when he wakes up just be standing there looking like a serial killer then without saying a word staple a bunch of notes to his chest and legs that say leave !, Get OUT! , Go AWAY! he will get the picture for sure. if he doesn't leave after that then kill him and make it look like an accident.

[AvengedX7]

give him... the casino royale james bond treatment! >=)

Are you saying to beat his balls with a large rope? And yeah whatever you do do it effectively and quick.

If he goes "Missing" would anyone ask questions. Like does he have close family that would notice him being gone

[Chode_Warrior]

this guy sounds like someone i would like to hang out with. I bet you could pay him to do crazy shit like on those bum fight crew videos. Maybe you should try that, you could probably get rich doing it too

Give him a pack of cigarettes, or just steal one of his, and load one of them up with salvia (make sure you put tobacco on the outside so he doesnt notice it. When he lights one of them up, put a garbage bag over his head and beat him with a golf club until he is unconscious. He will have tripped so hard that he would be pretty easy to do this to since people can barely function on salvia. Cast his feet in cement and stick him in your trunk (or drag him by your axle, but that will be suspicous). Once you arrive at your destination, which should be somewhere hard to get to late at night, drop him off. REMEMBER!!!! DO NOT FORGET TO BIND HIS HANDS AND COVER HIS BODY IN MACE!!! if you forget that part, you might as well not do any of it...

I already posted this in another thread, but i guess i can use it again since this time it has a twist.

[itwasryan]

if you just want to piss him the fuck off get some bungee cords (found in the back of every pick-up truck in america) and use like 10 of them to bound him to his bed. and then just leave the house to run some erronds for about 10 hours.

[Sokez]

Get him hooked on heroin, for a week then cut him off.
I would be far angrier if i was you, I admire your self-restraint, don't let that deter you.

[Buddha]

Necro thread guys, this guy isnt even on anymore.