your best pick up line

[numerator-91]

i challenge evryone to post their best pick up line and/or any pick up lines they have used in real life.

what winks and makes love like a tiger? *wink*

[brennan6632]

do u have a map to your heart? no? ok sorry kuz im lost in ur eyes! tehehe


do u live in a dumpster? kuz u look like a fuckin slut!


the second ones the most affective

[Kasnia]

I myself have not used this one, but a friend has and said that it actually worked:
"If I were a squirrel, could I put my nuts in your mouth?"
Why any girl would go for that is beyond me. Lol.

[frankenstein]

Ha Ha I've herd that before when i was in school a chick wrote a paper that said that in it, it was a little different though it was, if i was a squirrel and you were a tree then i would put my nuts in you. lol that shit is hilarious. never thought someone would actually try and use it though.

[superflysuperwhite]

"do you like air?"

[c73]

Ooh someone told me a great one recently.

"Do you come on your own?"
"Good, I like a girl that can come by herself."

haha :]

[51L3NC3]

Are your feet tired? You've been running through my mind all day!!

[Xavier_Blackstone]

Great legs, what time do they open?

[51L3NC3]

You're like a Pringle. Once I pop ya, I can't stop ya.

[51L3NC3]

Excuse me, but does this s***l like chloroform to you?

[Kasnia]

Excuse me, but does this s***l like chloroform to you?

Hahahahahahahahahah
That was a good one

[numerator-91]

since the moment you walked in this room, i've wanted to try out our interlocking parts

i've lost my phone number, can i have yours?

thats a nice dress, it would look even better on my bedroom floor

want to come back to mine for some pizza and sex?
what, don't you like pizza?

[Xavier_Blackstone]

Do you know how to use a whip?

[51L3NC3]

i like the pizza one numerator lol

[clyde.morris0217]

Is there a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.

[ItsAPoorlyKeptSecret]

I'm drunk.


haha bet that one will work on a guy

[clownpaint20]

excuse me but my car broke down and i was just wondering if you would give a blowjob

[CHEETZzz]

lol @ some of numerators and the last post before me.


Let's fuck!

[BadKarma..]

need help with math? add you and me subtract the clothes divide the legs and lets multiply

[numerator-91]

i personally like the chloroform one.

[51L3NC3]

it works way better than "can I buy you a beer?" because the chloroform one doesn't need a reply... only sleep... lol

[BadKarma..]

true. yea... teh chloroform ones got ym vote haha

[Dark-]

why don't you come over here, sit on my lap and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up?

do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?


these are my two favorite lines.

[a2thae]

Most pick up lines just don't work. You have to add a twist of humor into them to get the other person to talk to you.

My philosophy is I don't try to "pick-up" gals, I give them a chance to get to know me. I suppose back-handed compliments are ok, like "What are you? A statue model? *look in eyes* You look gorgeous" I have a few pickup lines, but I only use em if the girl is a 10.

Otherwise I'll go up and say something like "Hi, I saw you, and I just had to take a sec to get to know you." Then we have a conversation, I get the number, and walk away. Sometimes you get the cold ones with no sense of humor, but there is always a response for everything.

</irrelevant>I am tired as fuck right now..I haven't slept in 72 hours. So I might go pass out right now<irrelevant>

[51L3NC3]

yeah i agree, most p.u.l. dont work, but they sure do expel interesting and entertaining remarks or gestures...

[Viva la Guevara]

i have a good one but it be better if i did it in person ...

*pulls out both pockets so they hang out*

"wanna pet a bunny between the ears?"

the pockets look like bunny ears....HA!

[Shanx]

Nice shoes. Lets fuck.

[zaid990]

how come life is soo...unfair.... Girl:WHY? because ur soo much prettier then the other girls in this world

[Exploding_viper]

hey lets fuck like animals

ive actually gotten yesses in that line

[TotalAnarchyUK]

I would only kick you outta bed to shag you on the floor!

Wanna see my tan line?

[thedragonforce]

if your a chick hellz yea

[CrOnIc420]

guy: If you went camping and woke up and found a condom in your ass, would you tell anybody?

Girl:no

Guy:wanna go camping?

[51L3NC3]

lmao my DAD asked me that, except he said "If you went camping with a friend, woke up to find a bloody condom and experiencing butt pain, would you tell anyone?" I said "no" and he said "wanna go camping?" lol so funny and wrong

[deathlord888]

were you born on a chicken farm?

because you sure know how to raise a cock

[Warpurlgis]

lol rofl
i was waiting for a good response to that

[deathlord888]

ya i think it is so funny

[51L3NC3]

That reminds me of a joke... This man was nude sun bathing on the beach with just a hat over his dick. I woman walked by and said "You should be a gentleman and raise your hat in the presence of a lady." The man simply replied "If you weren't so fuckin ugly, it'd raise itslef!"

[Warpurlgis]

rofl omg funny shit

[fly2pluto]

ive always thought this one was kinda corny but hey:

"im no fred flinstone, but i can make your bedrock"

[marcraft]

back when i i looked like morrison , helo , i love you , could you tell me your name? the chloroform and the chicken farm are hilarious.

[51L3NC3]

thanks and agreed on the cock raising lol

[Viva la Guevara]

"wanna make that lolipop my dick?"

[a2thae]

Earlier today, the first time I've used a pickup line like this in 3 years, but:

"If I ask you for sex, will you give me the same answer as the answer to this question?"

hahaha. I love linguistics.

[straightedgepunk123]

Earlier today, the first time I've used a pickup line like this in 3 years, but:

"If I ask you for sex, will you give me the same answer as the answer to this question?"

hahaha. I love linguistics.

That's pretty sneaky. I love it.

[Palm3R]

Nice shoes, wanna fuck?
=p

[Warpurlgis]

that would be great if it worked!!!1

[nektar]

I got these from pickuphelp.com

Did you fart? Because you blew me away
You must be in a wrong place - the Miss Universe contest is over there.
Was that an earthquake or did u just rock my world?
I may not be a genie but I can make your dreams come true
Are you a magnet cuz im attracted to you
Does this rag s***l like chloroform to you?
I wish you were DSL so I could get high-speed access.
I know its not Christmas, but Santa's lap is always ready.
Baby your like a student and I am like a math book, you solve all my
problems
"Why does it feel like the most beautiful girl in the world is in this
room?"
Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa just what I want for
Christmas.
Do you have any raisins? No? How about a date?
I was blinded by your beauty so I'm going to need your name and number for insurance reasons.
I'm sorry, were you talking to me? Her: No. Well then, please start.
I know I dont have a chance, but I just wanted to hear an angel talk.
Roses are red, violets are blue, how would you like it if I came home with you?
Hey I just realized this, but you look alot like my next girlfriend.
Are your legs tired, because you've been running through my mind all day long.
Are you lost? Because heaven's a long way from here.
POOF! (What are u doing?) I'm here, where are your other two wishes?
I hope you know CPR, because you take my breath away.
Girl, you better have a license, cuz you are driving me crazy!
If you were the new burger at McDonalds you would be the Mcgorgeous!
Do you have the time? (she gives you the time) No, the time to write my number down .
Let's make like a fabric softener and snuggle.
Are you an interior decorator? When I saw you the room became beautiful.
Hello, I'm a thief, and I'm here to steal your heart.
Is that top felt? [No] Would you like it to be?
Apart from being sexy, what do you do for a living?
Is your last name Gillete cause your the best a man can get.
Are you a parking ticket? (What?) You got fine written all over you.
I'm invisible. (Really?) Can you see me? (Yes) How about tomorrow night?
You can fall off a building, you can fall out a tree, but baby, the best way to fall is in love with me.
I have never had a dream come true until the day that I met you.
You look life my first wife! (how many have you had?) none.
Do you have a sunburn, or are you always this hot?
I'm addicted to yes, and I'm allergic to no. So what's it gonna be?
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.
Turn to the girl sitting next to you at the bar and say... "I'm not really this tall....I'm sitting on my wallet."
This is a test of the emergency pickup line service. Beeeeeeeeeep. If you had been any less beautiful, you would have just heard a bad pickup line.
If this bar is a meat market, you must be the prime rib.
I know I'm not a grocery item but I can tell when you're checking me out.
If beauty were sunlight, you'd shine from a million light-years away.
Do you mind if I hang out here until its safe back where I farted.
Life without you would be like a broken pencil...pointless.
Your body is a wonderland and i want to be Alice.
I'm like chocolate pudding, I look like crap but im as sweet as can be.
Can I have directions? ["To where?"] To your heart.
Are you an alien? because you just abducted my heart.
Did you fart, 'cause you blow me away!
I hope there's a fireman around, cause you're smokin'!
If you were a booger I'd pick you first.
Excuse me, I think you have something in your eye. Nope, it's just a sparkle.
You've been a bad girl/boy. Go to my room.
If beauty were time, you'd be an eternity.
Do you know karate? 'Cause your body is really kickin'.
Are you as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside?
Like the sheets on your bed I want cover you with love.
Do you have a Bandaid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.
Hi, I just wanted to give you the satisfaction of turning me down; go ahead say no.
I hope your day is as radiant as your smile.
You make me ***t like hot fudge on a sundae.
You know what? Your eyes are the same color as my Porsche.
Are you an alien?, because you just abducted my heart.
What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper.
I can tell your future, it is you giving me your number.
Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.
Giant polar bear (What?) It's an icebreaker. Hi, my name is....
Your so hot when i look at you I get a tan
I must be a snowflake, 'cuz I've fallen for you.
You look so sweet your givin me a toothache.
My love for you is like the universe...neverending!!
If looks could kill you would be a weapon of mass destruction.
You - "Did it hurt". The other person will naturally say "Did what hurt?", You - "When you fell from heaven."
Excuse me, can you empty your pockets? I believe you have stolen my heart.
Do you have a map? Because I just keep getting lost in your eyes!
You say "I bet you $20 I can kiss you without using my lips." She says, "Bet's on." You kiss her then say, "I lost."
You got something on your chest: my eyes
Do you believe in the hereafter? Well, then I guess you know what I'm here after.
I don't know if you're beautiful or not, I haven't gotten past your eyes yet.
What does it feel like to be the most beautiful girl in this room?
Your eyes are as blue as my toilet water at home.
I'm not drunk, I'm just intoxicated by you.
Do you want to make millions? millions of babies!
The night is young, the moon is bright, and you are here with me tonight.
I wanna bag you like some groceries.
kiss me if I am wrong, but isn't your name (take a guess)...Janice????
Are you from Tennessee? Cause you're the only TEN I see

[fly2pluto]

lol

well since were on the subject of pick up lines...

how many have you actually tried?
any ones actually work?
and how about the ones that failed...any humiliating stories?

[51L3NC3]

lol

well since were on the subject of pick up lines...

how many have you actually tried?
any ones actually work?
and how about the ones that failed...any humiliating stories?

*runs downstairs to the basement to check on his "pick-up-girl" and undoes the gag to ask...* Did my chloroform work on you? *girl nods head and begins to cry as I run up the stairs to type a response* Nope, none of mine have worked... Why are you looking at me like that!? I'M INNOCENT!!!11!!!1!

[nektar]

Here's a line I never thought would work but it did. I'm not sure if I saw it in a movie but since nothing else was workinh I thought I'd give it a try. My friend and I were hanging around the ladies room at the local bar and when women would leave I'd say "let's cut all the bullshit....you wanna fuck?". I got plenty of names screamed at me and one girl hauled off and slapped me so hard I was seeing stars. I turned my head and said "that was nice, could you get this side?". She laughed and we sat down and had a few drinks and talked for a few hours. I ended up taking her home and actually got laid.

One other night I went up to a table with 5 women and proceeded to ask each one to dance. After I went through all of them there was one left and she said "why did you ask me last?" I said "well you're the most beautiful one here and I knew that you'ld say no so I didn't ask you first". She loved that and we danced and sat down for a few hours till she came over my house and had some incredible sex.

[MISFlT]

even tho alot of these are fuckin funny haha one that i actually used and work, well it made me meet a girl and we hang out a lot, maybe more later

Hey my names (name here), but u can call me 'tonight'

[Black Napalm]

Earlier today, the first time I've used a pickup line like this in 3 years, but:

"If I ask you for sex, will you give me the same answer as the answer to this question?"

hahaha. I love linguistics.

I still like this one. I'd love to see the reaction to this, it would be priceless.

[toasteroven_426]

If you sit on my face, I'll eat my way to your heart.

[deathlord888]

thats decent and messed at the same time haha

[RedBarron]

Baby your hotter than a 5 alarm housefire

[Kasnia]

If you sit on my face, I'll eat my way to your heart.

One of my ex's managed to find a Valentine's Card that said that. So romantic. -_- lol

[deathlord888]

haha that would be the best valentines gift ever

[Spyre]

Bend over.

[deathlord888]

Bend over.

haha i could just imagine the chicks face

[BadKarma..]

id be surprised if yuou could see straight enough to see her face... id figure she'd hit ya hard enough...

[I CeLL I]

That shirt is very becoming on you. If I was on you I'd be coming too.

Hey, why don't you come over and sit on my lap and we'll talk about the first thing that comes up.

[techtiger]

pick up lines are for chumps... but if you really want a good one here it is... tell her you have a little riddle for her, (most people like riddles) tell her to place her hand on the top of your palm(with the palm of her hand facing up.) tell her the story... so this is a river (point to one of the lines down the palm of her hand) there is a rabbit on this side of the river and a tree on the other side how does the rabbit get to the tree???
She will try all sorts of things, like it swam.... nope too fast of a river....it hopped on rocks... no rocks... it dug a whole... nope to deep.... it was carried by a bird... nope too heavy the list just goes on and on and on
after a few minutes she will be begging you to just tell her, thats when you bust out the line... idk i just wanted to hold your hand